Blog or white ... because it never is.

  Since May, 5 of my friends have announced the opening of new businesses.  I have a hard time deciding whether I am excited for them or jealous.  Maybe a little of both.  I don't have their creativity, their drive, their enthusiasm, their market research, or their zeal.   It feels like spring.  5 different people in 3 different provinces all willing to put it out there.  It is inspiring.  It is uplifting.   Spring is all about rebirth.  All about green meaning go.  All about freshness.  It is all about planting seeds and seeing what grows.   Most importantly, they all believe.  They are manifesting success.  The energy is amazing.  Be around these positive people.  They are out there.  Your life will be better.  

  We are all works in progress and I often feel like I am more under construction than most.  As a deeply flawed human, I am always trying to be better and learn more.   I confess that one of the things that I struggle with often is the concept of revenge.  There is a lot of things I have learned about revenge and forgiveness.  First of all, for me, seeking revenge has never worked out so well.  I have always seemed to come out worse off.  Even when I have gotten a momentary moment of bwahaha, it never seems satisfying or worth the effort.  I also know that forgiveness is a gift to yourself, and not to the person whom you forgive.  I know from hanging on to hurt and resentments, they fester inside you.  At the time, it doesn't seem fair, but I know that when I have forgiven, I feel lighter and I have more room inside me to grow. I also believe in the power of the universe and eventually people get what they deserve when they deliberately hurt others.  I know this happens but not ne

  And just like that, it feels like a spring thaw.  Not in the literal sense, well, maybe in the literal sense.  But, for me, the long "winter" of the last two years seems behind me.  Yes, we have "re-opened" in almost all aspects of society but it has still felt different from before.  It almost felt like my life would always be in two different modules:  before covid and after covid.   But, then something happened yesterday that was exciting.  It was a sign to me that life doesn't have to be an inward as it has been over the last two years.  There is opportunity for seeds to be planted and who knows what may grow.  While no one really knows what our future holds, I became excited about the future and possibilities.   I met a new couple.  That in itself is exciting.  Meeting new people.  Something I really haven't done in a while.  Hearing new stories and learning new things.   Meeting a new couple who live in a different province.  If this was a few years

  A twitter thread caught my attention this week.  A woman tweeted that there would be more women dealing and playing poker if they weren't sexually harrassed every day.   As you can imagine, it was a trending thread.   The first response was responded to more than the original tweet.  The first response was from a gentleman who tweeted that he had been playing for twenty years and he had never seen one incident of sexual harrassment.  He noted that all he had seen was men drunk who got "friendly."   That response essentially speaks for itself.  A woman trying to raise what she feels is a legitimate discussion point and wanting to provoke an honest discussion and a mansplaining telling her that her feelings and her experience is wrong.  What did this man expect?  That she would say, "oh, thank you for telling me this."  Thank you for telling me how to feel, thank you for telling me that my experiences are invalid.   Not to mention that getting drunk and getting

  Former celebrity chef Mario Batali has been acquited by a Judge in a case of sexual assault going back to 2017.  I should say former disgraced celebrity chef Mario Batali.  If you have never heard of him, that is because he has been out of the public eye for since 2017.  That is when multiple women came forward alleging sexual misconduct and as a result his restaurant and all other platforms severed ties with him.  For whatever reason, the only charge that the state of New York pursued was recently tried.  Batali elected a Bench Trial which means the Judge made the decision without the benefit of a jury.   In a decision that was quick after closing arguments, the Judge acquited Batali citing credibility issues of the complainant.   Apparently, the complainant once forged a document to get out of a gym membership.  The Judge concluded that if she would do, finances were her primary motivation.  If she would get out of paying for a gym membership, she would be motivated to make a false

 Every single individual has a unique story.  Personally, I love hearing people's life journeys, even the ones that are heart-breaking.  I have never not been fascinated or learned something after meeting someone new and learning their path.   Some of my journey is mundane, some of it has held too much strife, and most of it is blessed.  But, at the very start of my journey put me in a membership of a small club.  My father was over 55 when I was born.   When I was born, I was already an aunt.  My oldest sister had a son and was pregnant with her second child.  I was only a few months old when I became an aunt again.  At age 3, I became an aunt again twice.  My niece and I spent a great deal of time together while we were growing up.  Really, our relationship was more akin to cousins but she always called me Auntie Shelley.  It might have seemed weird to others looking in, but this was our lives and we didn't know it was weird.  It was just normal for us.   I don't know if

  Jacob Hoggard is on trial for two allegations of sexual assault from 2016.  He has not been found guilty by a Court of Law.   However, he has admitted to having consensual sex with each of the complainants.  Both complainants essentially had just turned 16 which is the age of consent in Ontario.  Both complainants also allege a web based relationship with Hoggard prior to the assaults.  Someone could make the argument that Hoggard had been grooming them prior to them reaching the age of consent.   Sadly, I have personal experience testifying about a sexual assault.  It was horrible.  The defence counsel has a job to do and victims are prepped for cross examination but it is never good enough.  Victims feel like they are on trial.  They are sharing details about their life they wish no one would ever know.  Unfortunately, no matter how much you feel like you want closure or how prepared you are or how deep your resolve, testifying is traumatic.   Which is one of the reasons why sexual

  My husband and I like to have ethical discussions.  Whenever he brings up the subject of abortion, I stop him and don't want to talk to him about it.  I tell him it is just a fundamental rule that I follow.  I don't debate or discuss abortions with anyone who doesn't have a uterus.   Regardless, when Kavanaugh was confirmed, he brought up Roe Vs. Wade and asked if we should be worried about it being overturned.  Relax, I said.  That is not how the Supreme Court works.  It doesn't just pick a law and overturn it.  The Supreme Court only rules on cases before them and getting a case before the Supreme Court is not an easy or quick process.  Plus, Supreme Court Justices are so incredibly busy, it is inconceivable that they would even think on weighing in on a matter that wasn't even before them.   And, I told him roughly the same thing that every Conservative Justice said at their confirmation hearings.  Roe vs Wade was decided in 1971 and had been challenged many ti