Blog or white ... because it never is.

On Christmas Day, my partner and I did something that we have never done before.  We picked up a hitchhiker.  It is a long story but we gave a ride to a man in the middle of our country that lasted about two and a half hours.  It is actually not a long story, but I don't tell short stories. We were traveling down the Trans Canada and there was a hitchhiker.  Of course, I have been told not to pick up hitchhikers so we passed by.  As we talked, we realized that this is not a sight you see very often anymore, and it was Christmas Day so there was virtually no traffic.  And, he didn't have any mitts and it was cold.  I decided we were going to go get him. Being on divided highway, we had to find a place to turn around.  The moment we start going back in the opposite direction, there is about 20 vehicles whizzing past.  Frankly, I felt a sense of relief.  One of these vehicles would have picked up the hitchhiker.  After all, it is really cold out and it is Christmas Day. 

Children are geniuses, we all know that.  The reason is that they are blank slates, or tabula rasa, as noted by John Locke.  Although the concept of the blank slate can be traced back to Aristotle.  Children are so smart because they don't know any better.  They don't know how to make assumptions, how to fear, how to hate.   Regular readers will know that I have the most perfect grandson in the world.  No, I am not biased.  What makes him perfect is that he doesn't know that I am an idiot.  It is true.  I am a deeply flawed human being, as we all are.  I have volumes of faults.  Actually, when I start to think about it, I am a complete moron   But, my grandson doesn't know that yet.  He was born a blank slate and I am his grandma.  So far, I am perfect.  The exciting thing about him being a blank slate is that if I play my cards right, he will never know that I am an idiot.  That is what motivates me.  I can rise above.  I can use my unique combination of life

I love my blog.  I guess I am a narcissist.  But, there is something that gives me a rush of adrenaline when I see that someone in Poland, Peru, Portugal, Phillipines,  or Papua New Guinea that I have never met nor never will is reading my words.  I really do feel that we are not exchanging ideas any more like we should, so I want to encourage more of that.  So, I blog even though that  has a consequence for me.  Right after I post, I must immediately go into a dark room and do a mindfulness practice while giving attention to my breathing.  As I am posting my latest entry, I am aware that somewhere in the world there is someone who is getting a smart phone notification that I have posted.  He immediately reads it and while he is reading, he is seething.  He is reading only to gather information to reaffirm his hypothesis about me.  Happily for him, I give him lots of ammunition.  I don't edit so there are tons of typos, sentence structure errors, etc.  It is poorly written and

How did we get here?  It is the holiday season and the most popular hashtag in the world is #TrumpResign.  Don't get me wrong.  I think his best before date expired a long time ago. I still believe I am going to wake up and the Trump Presidency is just going to be a dream.  I am glad I live in Canada but this nonsense down south is affecting the whole world.  If you don't believe me, check your retirement savings and look at how poorly any investments are doing these days.  If you haven't checked in a while, make sure you are sitting down and have whatever comforts you close.  Ten, twenty years ago at this time, the news would be about putting the Christ back into Christmas.  That is no longer an issue.  We no longer discuss religion.  Or politics.  Or anything else that we may disagree on, except sports.  We are still allowed allegiance to our favorite sports team and we are allowed to disagree on that.  Some people say we have become so "politically correct&quo

I have always had this great talent of picking neighbours who have perfectly manicured and landscaped yards all through the year.  I deeply watch enviously as cars drive by and slow down to admire their yards.  Some people take pictures.  My neighbours watch this over and over with pride.  Then, they glance over to my yard and their smiles turn to frowns.  I really try, but I just can't grow flowers.  I can't even grow weeds properly and I do my best to shovel, but it looks quite frankly, like I shoveled it.  I just have no talent with yard work.  Believe me, I know how annoying it is to my neighbours to be stuck with me.  I grew up in that house with the perfect manicured yard.  My father had this down to a science and had every tool available.  He had a snow blower, a riding lawn mover, a year round plan for fertilization, a well researched plan, and he had a secret weapon.  My mother.  She loved having the perfect gardens and flower beds.  She took great joy in motivati

Most people are talking and singing about silver belles, but I am going to talk about Silver Birch.  My mother's first job was at the Foam Lake School Board.  When she left, they give her a whole set of Silver Birch China.  The pictures show a small sampling.  I have the complete 8 piece set with every accessory available.  Gravy Boat.  Coffee Carafe.  Tea pot.  Vegetable Bowls.  Cake plates.  Pickle dishes.  My mother was so proud of this china set.  She got another full set of china when she got married, Chantilly Lace, but she loved her Silver Birch.  She loved special dinners when she could bring out her finest china.  I never got the appeal.  I didn't know how a birch tree could inspire china.  My mother was so proud to pass them down to me.  I confess, I felt like I drew the short straw.  I broke a coffee cup a couple of years ago during my annual dusting and found a replacement at The Bay.  I could not believe what they were charging.  I also confess, I have tried t

This is officially the longest night of the year.  They often have a special mass on this day at my Church called Blue Christmas.  It is held on the longest night of the year, fittingly, and it is a service designed to respect that, for many, Christmas is not the most wonderful time of the year.  It is usually crowded and all in attendance wail like babies.  Then we have coffee and cookies.  We are all strangers but we all hug each other and listen and share with each other.  It is a great power of human kindness and compassion.  I do not want to go on and on why it is a hard time of the year for me.  The truth is that even though today is the longest night of the year, everyone has their own longest night of the year.  Everyone has experienced strife in their life.  Everyone is fighting some battle that we may not see.  Sometimes, this is ironic.  When my mother was going through aggressive chemotherapy and lost her hair, perfect stranger would come up and wish her strength with

Yeah, my eye again but do not worry, it is not really about that.  I want to talk about empathy.  You know those television commercials by an insurance company where they try to teach their employees empathy by destroying their cars and making them fully water-logged.  I can not stand those commercials, mostly because I wonder what kind of society we are that we have to teach empathy.  Should that not be hard-wired in our DNA.  Oh.  Wait.  I have been told that I can not say anything in my blog or social media that might be considered criticism.  I take that back.  I love that we need to teach empathy.  I love that we can not just feel for our fellow earthlings and understand things from their perspective.  I love that empathy is something that we need to teach. Yesterday, my partner was struggling with something.  He has had to come out of denial and into reality.  It is a reality that I have been proving beyond a shadow of a doubt for several years.  Yet, he still maintained his

I have always been a Survivor fan.  It is one of my guilty pleasures.  The game that encourages you to outwit, outlast, out play.  It has survived the test of time.  This spring will be 38th season.  I know as much Survivor Trivia as anyone.  When it first started, I wanted to be on Survivor.  Canadians were not allowed to submit audition tapes.  Now, sadly, it is too late in my life.  I remember at a very difficult time in my life, I found a chat room.  Since I was not leaving the walls of my home, this chat room was my life line.  I remember random people telling me I would be good on Survivor.  I suppose saying that makes me narcissistic and I know my blog is an example of badly-written self-serving drivel.  I watch every season thinking of how I would play the game.  I think anyone who has survived a lot is naturally attracted to this game.  Last night as I watched, I kept hearing about big moves.  Big moves are essential to the game of Survivor.  I can not be on Survivor but

It is the time of year when we start looking forward to the next year.  I will be preparing my inventory soon.  In the mean time, here are some resolutions that will make Manitoba better.  1.  All of us should find a little person that we love unconditionally.  There are lots of little people out there, so if you don't have one of your own, likely they are in your extended family or neighbourhood.  If you can't identify a little person in your life, consider fostering.  This includes fur little people.  There are tons of them out there who need your love.  Having someone in your life who is little and vulnerable gives your perspective. You want the world to be a better place.  You want to be a positive role model.  You don't have time for petty drama.  2.  Be more like my sweetie.  He volunteers for everything.  He selflessly gives of himself, including his blood.  I am so proud of him.  In 2019, I am going to keep track of his volunteer hours. I am sure it will be ab

The rest of my final year is Toastmistress was good.  I was still learning, but many of the things I was learning were not things that I wanted to learn.  The addition of this particular member brought a new level of nastiness to our debates.  I continued to learn poise and not to take things personally.  I became very tolerant and I don't know if that was the best lesson.  What is taught me was to repress my feelings and not to advocate for myself.  It was just a club so I let most things go unchecked.  In my future life, I let people walk all over me and advocated for others and not for myself.  I was taught to be poised.  Only one time did I address the nastiness.  At one point, I said, "The Chair is annoyed when you do that."  It was actually effective in the moment.  I should have shown more leadership.  Our club culture was changing and our meetings were not as well attended as they once were.  We were disappointed in the International Organization.  We felt b

There I was in Grade 12 and President of the Dauphin Toastmistress Club.  Except, we were no longer the Dauphin Toastmistress Club.  Over the summer, International Toastmistress Clubs became International Training in Communication.  So, we were still ITC  and we still were using the same logo.  For a club was devoted to communication, we felt very disturbed that this major change happened with little consultation.  We were told that this was necessary for our organization to grow.  People thought we were a female only organization and the change was meant to attract male members.  Our club debated this fiercely, even though the decision had been made and there was nothing to be done.  We directed our Secretary and President to write letters to the International Headquarters.  Also, there was no marketing support for the new change.  We certainly did not attempt to attract male members and if one stumbled our way, we would have redirected them to Toastmasters.  We still called ourselv

I was in Grade 11 and Vice-President of my Toastmistress Club.  I was still learning and still progressing.  One of the best things about the Wednesday evening meetings was that I got to wear "nice" clothes.  No one really wore jeans to meetings, so one day a week, I would wear a skirt or a dress, higher heels, and make-up.  It sounds silly but that was valuable learning.  Walking in heels and wearing make-up that was subtle yet professional were too great lessons.  The role of Vice-President was not that taxing.  In the early of that year, a new couple moved to Dauphin.  She joined Toastmistress immediately.  She also joined literally every club and organization in Dauphin.  She had been a Toastmistress on the West Coast for many years and also she had been to an International Convention.  We were excited to have her.  And, then we weren't.  She knew everything, according to her.  We had other members join and rejoin after taking a break.  None of them changed the &q

Attending Toastmistress meetings was not typical of the high school experience, but it was an enjoyable time of mine.  In Spring, we had our annual speech contest.  It was very different from how Toastmasters handle speech contests.  Unless you had a really good reason, you were competing in the contest.  My first year in Toastmistress, I had a really good reason.  It was my first year.  My second year, I was competing because I didn't have a good reason not to.  The role of the Speech Contest Chairman was very important.  One week before the contest, the speech contest chairman would hand you a sealed envelope.  If you didn't get an envelope, you couldn't decide at the last moment to enter.  In your envelope,  you would get three words or three phrases.   Everyone would have different words, but everyone would have the same formula.  It could be that everyone got three nouns or one noun, one adverb, and one phrase, or whatever combination the Speech Contest Chairman

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire?  Has anyone actually seen or done this?   I remember Boxing Day in 1992.  I got into an elevator and an older woman asked me how my Christmas was.  I could have just said "fine, thanks" and ended the conversation.  For some reason, I said, "it was awful, my father past away."  The woman hugged me and said that she had become a widow on Christmas Day a few years ago.  We ended up hugging and talking and crying for a long while after.  Then, I quickly made my way through a snow storm to a funeral home.  I can't remember which one.  I had to get there before noon and I had to sign papers in order for my father to be cremated according to his wishes.  I don't know why or how I became the family spokesperson for my father's affairs,  But, it started the day before.  We were sitting in a hospital room after my dad has passed and we were told that someone wanted to talk to the family spokesperson on the phone.  My mo

So, here I was starting Grade 10 and starting my second year as a Toastmistress.  I was Club Treasurer and also on a few committees.  There was no more whispers about me not belonging because I was too young.  In fact, the ladies encouraged me to recruit my friends.  I really tried because I knew what a positive difference it was happening in my life.  None of my friends were interested in becoming Mistresses of the Bread.  They couldn't understand why I was wasting an evening a week and even doing extra work during the week.  It didn't negatively affect my grades and I think it was actually enhancing them as I was more confident and was learning time management skills as well positive reinforcement for what I was learning.   As it also turned out, I became more attuned that ITC standing for International Toastmistress Clubs.  It was an international organization.  We were in a Council called Council 8 which coincidentally contained 8 clubs in South Western Winnipeg.  Co

Well, I haven't ranted about Tim's yet this month, and things get busy during the holidays, so I better get to it before time gets the better about me.  First of all, the ailing company tried to develop new lids that don't spill as much.  Instead of using domed lids like every other coffee company with common sense, Tim's chose to basically use the same lid with a maple leaf design on it.  What a waste of time on their part.  The new lids apparently leak just as much if not more.  Plus, they are basically depending on their employees to put the lid on properly so that it doesn't spill or leak.  These are the same employees that they treat poorly, ie cutting their breaks, hours, benefits, etc.  The same employees that they fired one for giving a toddler a free Timbit.  I'm sure those employees are going to go the extra mile to make sure the lid is on perfectly.  They are still trying to manipulate the Canadian consumers to think that this is a Canadian com

Everything was going well in my Toastmistress journey.  I was still in Grade 9 but my confidence was increasing and there were only a few lingering whispers about me being too young.  Then, in February, our Secretary suddenly had to quit the club due to personal reasons.  We needed a Secretary pro tem.  This would be elected, however, because this person wouldn't be formally inducted with the rest of the executive, so would be Secretary pro tem for the rest of the year.  I knew that wouldn't be me as there were more experienced Toastmistress members that had not yet begun their Executive journey.  Before our next meeting, the Chairman of the Nominations Committee informed me that I would be nominated as Secretary. I protested and said I would decline the nomination.  No way did I need that headache.  The Nominations Chair informed me that I would be nominated and the reason was because I was not progressing fast enough in the program.  Once elected, I felt a little vomi

So now that I was an official member, I completed my IceBreaker Speech.  There were many similarities in terminology between Toastmistress and Toastmasters and there were striking similarities in the program, however, things were handled very differently. At Toastmistress, the President, Treasurer, and Secretary were at the front table for the entire meeting.  There was a business meeting every meeting and lasted one hour.  Occasionally, there would need to a Motion to extend for 10 minutes.  We strictly had a business meeting for the practice of using Parliamentary Procedure according to Robert's Rules of Order Newly Revised.  We all had the book and it was very worn.  We emphasized parliamentary procedure more than anything.  The President always referred to themselves in the third person and as the Chair.  The hardest job was the Secretary who had to not only take minutes correctly but had to read them every meeting.  The Chair would not even be through asking if there were

Since Friday, we have been learning more about President George Herbert Walker Bush.  The real deal.  The statesman, the public servant, the hero, the visionary, the hand-written letter writer.  I have heard so much about his quiet approach to diplomacy and leadership.  But, watching his funeral today, I was taken back almost 26 years ago to my father's funeral.  And, it took me back to a funeral that I attended last summer of the father of a friend of mine.  All three funerals were so similar.  They had lots of tears because they were loved by so many, but they also had a lot of laughs.  It is so true.  The human experience is universal. Of course, the President's funeral was the largest attended and had millions watching across the world. Like any funeral, it had its share of behind the scenes drama.  Three former Presidents and First Ladies sat in the front row.  President  Carter and Rosalynn sat stoic and only talked to each other.  They have been so focused on servi