Three Men I Hardly Know
The first man is one that lives in my building. Before yesterday, I didn't know his name but we were familiar enough to talk in the elevator or lobby when we saw each other. We would talk about the weather or sports and he was always kind enough to ask about my grandson. Yesterday, I saw him in the lobby and before I could say hello, he said "I am not doing well." He recently experienced a loss and he took a risk confiding in an acquaintance. We talked for a long time and made a plan to talk again. It was weird exchanging phone numbers with someone when we didn't even know each other's first names. We hugged and he cried real tears. People were walking by and he was still crying real tears. What a brave and honest man. He was hurting and didn't care who knew. He was crying in public and essentially honoring the person he lost. That is a man worth knowing. Someone willing to share that he is not ok and doesn't care who knows. A very brave man.
The second man is an acquaintance who doesn't know the profound impact he has had on my life. I wrote a blog entry about homelessness about a year ago. He shared it and added a comment that he had experienced homelessness and my blog entry was worth reading. I was deeply moved. This brave man has inspired me to continue blogging. Whenever I get discouraged, I can remember the one time when I got it right. Last night, I ran into him at a social event. He was having a good time at a night out with his wife. He laughed and just enjoyed himself. He never had any need to put anyone down to bring himself up. He was just being his authentic self. And, that was enough. It takes an insightful man to have the confidence in his own skin to be himself. While most of us wear many masks, he just finds it simpler to be himself. I wasn't jealous of his happiness because just being around him made me happier. Happiness has a way of being infectious.
The third man I hardly know is my partner's brother, my brother-in-law. As little as I know the first two men, I know him the least. I have been cautioned not to say anything critical, so I will accept full responsibility for us having no relationship. I am sure I have put up all the barriers to communication. Regardless, I emailed him (like I said, no relationship) asking him for a letter of support for his brother. He is such an important time that he couldn't respond to my email but phoned his brother to pass on a message. He wouldn't be writing a letter of support. So, this third man influenced me. A great man will always have time to extend kindness and I have a lot of great men in my life.
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