Karen?

My mother's favorite contemporary artist was Usher.  Her all-time favorite artist was Louis Armstrong.  Her favorite actor was LL Cool J.  Her favorite journalist was Don Lemon. She loved all things Obama and it literally pained her when someone criticized them. 

My mother was many things but she was not a Karen. 

What was remarkable about that was that she lived her first three decades in small towns in Saskatchewan.  Like really small towns.  I think if you added up the cumulative population of the communities in which she lived in her youth, you might get 500.  Small farming communities that were populated by Ukrainian immigrants. 

Just before she turned 30, she had to face the culture shock of moving to a big city.  It must have been hard adjusting to living in a metropolis like Dauphin, the first place that she lived that had an actual stop light.  The point is that I don't know when she met her first person of colour.  I just know that it wasn't into well in her adulthood.  I don't know why she was drawn to people of colour, but she was.

In a world where you can be anything, my mother always chose to be kind. 

I've been thinking of my mother's example as I have been reflecting on my own behaviours.  Do I behave like an entitled white woman?  Of course, no one thinks that they are racist.  But, do I have an unconscious bias? 

I might.  I remember falling in love for the first time.  The guy was smart, handsome, and had a great sense of humour.  And, he was Asian.  I didn't tell my parents about him because I was worried that they would not approve.  I used to talk to him about it.  I said I was pretty sure they wouldn't have a problem with his skin colour, but, I didn't want to risk it.  I now realize how arrogant I was being.  At some point, I was alone at his place when the phone rang and it was his mother.  I just naturally assumed she would have heard all about me, but, she didn't even know that he had a girlfriend.  I later asked him why he had mentioned my existence to his parents.  He said they would never approve of him being in an inter-racial relationship.  I actually said, "but, I'm white".  I actually never considered that I would be the one judged on the basis of my skin colour.  That is white privilege.  Thinking you are better than someone for no good reason. 

I am not proud of it but I definitely have had moments of unconscious bias.  Worse than that, there have been times when I have seen or heard entitlement in my circle, and I haven't spoken out because I didn't want to rock the boat.  I now realize that I can't be a social justice warrior unless I do address it when I see it. 

I may not be a Karen, but the reality is that we sadly we have seen examples of such in Winnipeg.  It has been likely going on for a long time, the difference is that now it is being filmed on people's phones. 

When it comes to social justice, an injustice anywhere is an injustice everywhere.  The Karens are out there.  I hope I am not one, but, if you see it in me, please call me out and I will be willing to listen and learn. 

And, that is how we achieve social justice.  Being open to listening and learning.