Ironically, We Are Still Together
We met four years before we began our relationship. He will tell people that he didn't like me. He can say that, but, a girl knows when someone has a crush on her. He had a crush on me. But, he was a very angry guy. I remember one time, we were at a gathering, and he started expressing some of this anger to me. It wasn't me that he was angry at, but, I let him vent. Another woman joined this one-way conversation. She was flirting with him. I kept trying to redirect him to this other woman, but, he just kept being angry. I wondered what other opportunities he has missed.
Somewhere in those four years before our first date, he fell asleep while he was judging a speech contest in which I was competing. He doesn't like that I bring this up. He was sitting in the back row completely asleep and no one saw but me. I was very ticked off. I have forgiven him. It turns out in that organization, other things occurred that ticked me off.
He finally asked me out as the relationship I was in was fizzling out. On our first date, he used the word "ironic" wrong so many times that I lost count. But, I couldn't point it out on the first date because I didn't want to look like a witch. That was a third date conversation.
Our third date came and I kept to my plan. I unleashed the kraken on irony. As usual, I went too far but I was on a roll and couldn't stop. After I finished my tirade, I added, "and you have low-grade depression." He became very quiet. My work was done and the date was over.
He called me later that evening. He had been researching depression. It was clear to him that he had depression and this was the first time that someone had mentioned this to him. I ended up listening as he overflowed with emotion that he didn't know what to do with.
I had broken him. I couldn't stop seeing him until he was fixed. As we progressed, it became very clear that I didn't break him, but I wanted to see him in a better place.
It, frankly, was difficult. I was attracted to him because he had never been married nor had children. No baggage. Little did I know that he had a matching Samsonite leather 11 piece set of luggage. There was a lot. He was a lot.
I'm a lot. It is not easy being with me. Like he says, I'm a pistol. I wish he wouldn't make a reference to me that involves guns. See, what I mean, I am a lot.
When times got difficult and I would confide in my best friend, she wouldn't let me end the relationship. Her basis was that I am a Libra and he is a Pisces and that is a good combination. She is also a Pisces and she would explain his actions according to his Pisces and how I needed to adapt to accommodate. I didn't believe in astrology but I never broke up with him.
In the meantime, he transformed his life. He sought treatment for his depression through medication and therapy. He worked really hard. It certainly wasn't a straight up trajectory but the more he embraced his depression, the more moments of enjoyment he accumulated. As he became more positive and happy, he attracted more positive and happy people into his life.
I remember on our first date, I said something funny (I am hilarious!!) and he put his hand over his mouth and giggled. I noticed that he rarely smiled or laughed out loud. Now, he smiles all the time and laughs uproariously.
Many addicts who are in recovery believe that in order to stay sober, you must help others stay sober. Andrew, didn't know this, but felt an urge to help others. He started a blog to chronicle his mental health journey. It is called "struggling to smile". I think he should call it "struggle to smile no more".
Then, he started volunteering with Canadian Mental Health Association. Talk about a rolling stone gathering no moss. That just became a powerful force in his life. He may have helped some, but, it has helped him like no other thing. I am so proud of him.
And, somewhere along the way, we had been together for years. It turns out Pisces and Libra do complement each other.
Then, we became grandparents. Our little bundle of joy has changed our lives forever. It is unbelievable how much we love this little man. I'm sure there wasn't much doubt before, but, ever since he came into our lives, it has cemented our relationship forever, and I couldn't be happier.
Looking forward to many more moments of enjoyment because, ironically, we are still together.
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