Low Grade Depression or Something Else?

Well over a decade ago, I attended a day long workshop.  I can't remember what the workshop was about but I remember the Ice-Breaker exercise.  When you attend a workshop that you are going to be working in groups of people that you are unfamiliar with, you are assigned an exercise to get to know each other while having a moment of enjoyment.  This prepares you to work on more difficult matters later in the day.  I have to tell you Ice-Breakers are my jam.  I enjoy them and I am one of the only people who always volunteers to do role-plays.  I love the discussion and I just love the process.  In this particular ice-breaker, we were to agree as a table of 8 who we all would like to go for supper with.  It could be anyone, living or dead, real, or fictional. 

I heard other tables talking and names were being discussed.  Terry Fox.  Oprah.  Elvis.  Nelson Mandela.  John F Kennedy.  Jesus.  Sherlock Holmes.  Participant's deceased family members.  Princess Diana.  Really good discussion which I enjoy. 

I turned to my table and announced MICHELLE OBAMA.  Someone said it was a good choice and did anyone else have any suggestions.  MICHELLE OBAMA.  Again, someone said it was a good choice, did anyone else have any ideas.  MICHELLE OBAMA.  For some reason, I was adamant that there was no other choice for our fictional dinner party and we weren't going to discuss anyone else.  We were just going to cut to the chase, our guest would be MICHELLE OBAMA and I would report to the larger group why we came to this consensus. 

Why was so forceful when I am normally shy.  Well, to me, Michelle Obama is just one of those forces of nature that only comes around once in a generation. 

I am a big fan.  First of all, the woman has to be the most gorgeous woman on the planet.  Just strikingly beautiful but that exterior beauty is just radiating what is on the inside. She is smart, articulate, funny, and any other positive thing that you can attribute to a human being.  She is a great mother. To me, she represents the America that I like to think exists.  Not perfect, but hopeful, unlimited capacity to love and forgive, not afraid to dance like nobody's watching, and unlimited potential. To me, most of all, she is authentic.  I haven't agreed with everything she has said, but I truly respect her enough to listen.

I read "Becoming" in one sitting and have watched the Netflix series several times.  I cry every time.  I probably know more about her than she knows about herself, but not in a creepy way. 

So, yes, I agree that it is a tremendous step to removing stigma of mental illness by her announcement that she has low-grade depression.  It is literally life-changing for many people who have been trying to have difficult discussions with friends and family.  She is normalizing depression for the world. 

Also, who has been living on the planet over the last six months that haven't had challenges with their mental health.  She claims that her low-grade depression is not about Covid19 but more about racial strife and the deep political divide.  That certainly seems legitimate but I wonder if she is really living with low-grade depression or could it be something else? 

I wonder if Michelle Obama is suffering from cumulative stress disorder?  Look at her life as the first black FLOTUS.  She was photographed, videographed, scheduled almost 24/7.  Look at the expectations. No one else but her could have handled it.  Every word you say analyzed.  Every look the subject of international speculation.  Every outfit critiqued.  America expected her to be perfect every day in every way and a "light" day of scheduling for her would be a 12 hour day.  And, all the while, while they were going low, she had to keep going high.  Forget the expectations that we placed on her, think about the expectations she placed on herself.  She was probably physically exhausted and at the end of her rope several times, but she felt she needed to be "fresh and up" for every new person she might meet.  I don't know how, but she performed her role flawlessly.  Every day, her day was probably more stressful than most people deal with in a lifetime.  How could she not eventually crash?

I applaud her authenticity to acknowledge that she is going through something.  I wonder, however, if it can lead to a deeper conversation in society.  Maybe it is time we actually looked at our expectations of those who enter public life in politics. 

Who would want to endure what Michelle Obama endured?  Or her husband?  Or any other elected official or family member of one?  Having virtually no private life.  Having to be perfect all the time.  Having to know everything and speak about it articulately at any moment?  Having to have half millions of people cheering for you to fail?  The expectations are beyond belief. 

Honestly, as a society, we are discouraging people from entering politics.  It is just too demanding.  We are potentially losing a lot of great leaders that just don't want their every move under a microscope. 

If we don't have a reckoning soon about our expectations of people in politics, I worry what will happen.  I worry that the only people that will be attracted to politics are narcissistic bullies who actually don't give a damn about anyone but themselves.  Can you even imagine what that would be like? 

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