When You Don't Give Back....

Last year, just before the Grey Cup, Sports Manitoba had a Hot Stove event during lunch hour.  Attendees had an opportunity to hear from Chris Walby, James Murphy, and Joe Poplawski.  I pitied the people who work with my husband.  He attended and I am sure he talked about nothing else for the rest of the afternoon. The same man who can't remember three items that I ask him to pick up from the store was able to spend all evening telling me verbatim everything they said. The event was only one hour long but I heard about it for over three hours.  You would have thought these local celebrities would have been somewhat arrogant, but that wasn't the case.  They focused on the behind the scenes stories and ones that were particularly self-deprecating.  James Murphy never heard of Winnipeg until he was here, but made a life here beyond football.  Chris Walby tells the funniest of stories about playing in the Grey Cup in Vancouver where they thought they were going to an autograph session and ended up at a live Bingo game.  You have to ask them about these stories, and you probably will have the opportunity to do so.  All three of these men give back.  I have seen them participate in many events for charity.  I have also seen them out for lunch or coffee and they are always gracious to fans.  They continue to build successful lives and have their priorities in order.

Over and over, people of wealth or celebrity give back to our community.  You can see it everywhere in Winnipeg.  So many buildings are dedicated to people who have made substantial financial contributions to making Winnipeg better.  Those that don't have material wealth contribute their time to making our city and our world stronger and better.  We have so many people to celebrate their contributions and inspire us to make a difference. 

And, then there is those that don't give back. 

This morning the news told of the latest legal trouble of Peter Nygard.  Two of his sons are suing him. Presumably, these are two of his sons that he acknowledges. Publicly, it is not known how many children he has sired. I am sure this has not phased Peter.  He has spent the majority of his professional life in court in some sort of lawsuit.  This is nothing new for him. 

Certainly, however, 2020 has been exceptional for Nygard in the legal department.  At first, it was a couple of females accusing him of sex-related charges.  He was able to brush this off as a consequence of a long-standing dispute between him and his neighbour in the Bahamas.  His Winnipeg attorney, Jay Probert, thought this was his Johnny Cochrane moment, as he defended him in the media with amazing passion. Of course, he was doing this for Nygard's benefit.  The rest of us thought, "have you spent more than fifteen minutes with your client?"  Most who have spent more than 15 minutes with him can attest to the "creepy" factor that he has.  Next thing, we know his fashion empire files for bankruptcy and closes New York Offices after being raided by the FBI.  Soon there was more women making accusations so now it is a class action law suit.  Then, he turned his business over to a trustee to manage.  Then, there were allegations that he was still involved in the day-to-day operations of the building.  Finally, he has been in Court trying to prevent his assets from being seized by trying to claim that one of his business locations was also his primary residence.  It goes on and on, but, I would hope having two of your sons sue you publicly would be particularly troublesome for most people. 

Of course, he is innocent until proven guilty.  Although, it seems like a waste of time because that process may take years and I am sure there will be nothing for his victims to get in terms of compensation. 

One thing that doesn't have to be proven in Court is that Nygard has never really given back.  He has not used his "wealth" or "fame" to help others.  I only know of one charity that he indirectly supports and I think he does that for reasons that don't have much to do with charity. 

It just seems that people who don't give back by either sharing their wealth or sharing their time seem to have harder paths in life and seems to get into the media for reasons that they would not like too.  It just seems that you look at those who haven't given back, and I am including Jeffrey Epstein, Harvey Weinstein, and Ghilaine Maxwell in the list, seem to attract a lifestyle that is criminal.  If they don't acknowledge they owe the universe for their success, karma will make them accountable. 

Try an experiment for yourself.  When you wake up tomorrow, make a vow to be kind to everyone you meet.  It can be as simple as saying hello, giving them a compliment, or asking how they are doing.  If you encounter a stranger, a smile is fine.  Just be kind all day without any expectation in return.  See how you feel at the end of the day.   The next day, try the opposite.  You be the taker and don't be kind to anyone, just focus on yourself.  See how you feel at the end of the day.  I know that you will see the value that giving back has in your life. 

It is a weird thing but the more you give of yourself, the more you get back.  Too bad, Nygard never learned that lesson.  Even more unfortunate that he is associated with Winnipeg.